What is more contagious than swine flu,SARS or Anthrax?? The answer is LAUGHTER. once it has started, it can spread out as far as eyes can see. Based on several researches, it shows that laughter is the best medicine there is for humans. Laughter is a powerful antidote to stress, pain, and conflict. Nothing works faster or more dependably to bring your mind and body back into balance than a good laugh. Humor lightens your burdens, inspires hopes, connects you to others, and keeps you grounded, focused, and alert. With so much power to heal and renew, the ability to laugh easily and frequently is a tremendous resource for surmounting problems, enhancing your relationships, and supporting both physical and emotional health. Humor and laughter strengthen your immune system, boost your energy, diminish pain, and protect you from the damaging effects of stress. Best of all, this priceless medicine is fun, free, and easy to use.
Here are some benefits of laughter for your health:
* Laughter relaxes the whole body. A good, hearty laugh relieves physical tension and stress, leaving your muscles relaxed for up to 45 minutes after.
* Laughter boosts the immune system. Laughter decreases stress hormones and increases immune cells and infection-fighting antibodies, thus improving your resistance to disease.
* Laughter triggers the release of endorphins, the body’s natural feel-good chemicals. Endorphins promote an overall sense of well-being and can even temporarily relieve pain.
* Laughter protects the heart. Laughter improves the function of blood vessels and increases blood flow, which can help protect you against a heart attack and other cardiovascular problems.
Here is Jonathan Ross opening speech during British Comedy Awards 2009
Some funny quotes to start the domino effects of laughter:
"A woman told her doctor, 'I've got a bad back. 'The doctor said, 'It's old age.' The woman said, 'I want a second opinion. 'The doctor says, 'OK. you're ugly as well.'"
~ Tommy Cooper
"A man walked into the doctor's, he said 'I've hurt my arm in several places'.
The doctor said 'well don't go there any more'. "
~ Tommy Cooper
"I went to the Doctors the other day, and he said, 'Go to Bournemouth, it's great for 'flu.
So I went, and I got it.'"
~ Tommy Cooper
"Why is abbreviation such a long word?"
~ Steve Wright
"The husband who wants a happy marriage should learn to keep his mouth shut and his checkbook open."
~ Groucho Marx
"I could dance with you till the cows come home, on second thought I'll dance with the cows till you come home."
~ Groucho Marx
"Paying alimony is like feeding hay to a dead horse. "
~ Groucho Marx
"Ah, yes, divorce ... from the Latin word meaning to rip out a man's genitals through his wallet"
~ Robin Williams
"Politics: "Poli" a Latin word meaning "many"; and "tics" meaning "bloodsucking creatures "
~ Robin Williams
"In England, if you commit a crime, the police don't have a gun and you don't have a gun. If you commit a crime, the police will say "Stop, or I'll say stop again"
~ Robin Williams
"Do you think God gets stoned? I think so . . . look at the platypus"
~ Robin Williams
"Dogs are the leaders of the planet. If you see two life forms, one of them's making a poop, the other one's carrying it for him, who would you assume is in charge. "
~ Jerry Seinfeld
"Now they show you how detergents take out bloodstains, a pretty violent image there. I think if you've got a T-shirt with a bloodstain all over it, maybe laundry isn't your biggest problem. Maybe you should get rid of the body before you do the wash. "
~ Jerry Seinfeld
"The Swiss have an interesting army. Five hundred years without a war. Pretty impressive. Also pretty lucky for them. Ever see that little Swiss Army knife they have to fight with? Not much of a weapon there. Corkscrews. Bottle openers. "Come on, buddy, let's go. You get past me, the guy in back of me, he's got a spoon. Back off. I've got the toe clippers right here." "
~ Jerry Seinfeld
"I once had a leather jacket that got ruined in the rain. Why does moisture ruin leather? Aren't cows outside a lot of the time? When it's raining, do cows go up to the farmhouse, "Let us in! We're all wearing leather! Open the door! We're going to ruin the whole outfit here!" "
~ Jerry Seinfeld
"A successful man is one who makes more money than his wife can spend. A successful woman is one who can find such a man."
~Lana Turner
Last but not least, here's a local joke for you:
Three guys were given chance to meet god. One is a Chinese, another an Indian and the third one a Malay. all three are football fanatics. the first one, the Chinese, is summon upon by the god.
God : Ask me anything and I shall answer.
Chinese : In that case, when will China win their first world cup?
God : Uno, Dos, Tres...Umm, China will win in approximately three hundred years from now.
The Chinese man go out and meet the other two.
Indian : Why are you crying?
Chinese : (Crying and sobbing) I will not be alive when China lift the first World Cup trophy.
Then the Indian is summoned.
God : Ask, and the answer is yours.
Indian : Will India win the World Cup?
God : Siji, loro, telu, papat, limo...Five hundred years, that is the period where India will be triumphant.
The Indian came out sobbing heavily but smiling at the same time.
Chinese : What's with the smile?
Indian : Even though i'd be long gone at that time, but i know India will finally win the World Cup
Lastly, the anxious Malay is going in.
God : Anything you have in doubt will be cleared for you here.
Malay : The World Cup. I want to know when will it come to Malaysia?
God : ........... .................. ............. ............. .............. ................ ............... ............
He went out blurred and confused.
Chinese : So?How is it?
Indian : What happen in there?
Malay : I don't know. I just asked what you guys did, He cried....
